I was recently introduced to the idea that control and influence were opposing forces. It initially struck me as a baffling, but as I let it sink in it started to make more sense. Have you been caught in this trap of trying to control everything as your path to success? Maybe it’s time to let go?
As a business owner, are you responsible for everything?
As business owners we’re told that we’re responsible for everything and that we can only change that which we control, but at the same time it quickly becomes clear that we simply can’t control everything. So what gives? What are we supposed to do?
Control quickly breaks down because there’s simply too much complexity – there are too many variables. Our efforts to control leave us feeling overwhelmed, distracted, unfocused, and like our efforts are being diluted – becoming increasingly ineffective and causing more and more frustration. Ever been there? I know I have.
I was recently introduced to the idea that control and influence were opposing forces. It initially struck me as a baffling, but as I let it sink in it started to make more sense. So let’s break it down.
Let’s start with what you can control. For the most part, you can control yourself – your actions, words, and thoughts. It might take some practice, but this is where you can exert the most control in your life. From there you can also control your intentions, the clarity of your creative vision, and your emotional energy.
The list of things you can’t control? Pretty much everything else. More specifically you can’t control other people or their actions, words, or thoughts and you can’t control the results you get in your business or your life. You can’t make people like you, buy from you, respond to your marketing campaigns, follow your systems and procedures, or any number of other things you’d prefer that they did to make your life better.
The problem is, most business owners, possibly even you, spend most of their energy focused on trying to control others and turn the relationship on it’s head.Control is the path to frustration. Influence is the path to success. Click To Tweet
So how do you get what you want?
Let’s look at influence. If you stop and think about it you’ll probably quickly realize why influence is so much more powerful and effective. Influence is about connecting and communicating with others. It’s about confidently sharing your clear creative vision and managing emotional energy. We’ve seen powerful examples of this throughout history. It’s called leadership. And it’s what we’d all like more of in our lives and our businesses.
The good news is that influence is your best opportunity to get everything you want, and you’re perfectly equipped, possibly with some practice, to put this tool to work for you right now.
It might just take a little faith. Faith that God or the universe wants to you to be happy and successful and faith that you’ve been given all the tools and resources you need to accomplish that.
Sure you might need some practice and maybe a little help, but that’s what I’m here for.
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P.S. If you liked the tips provided in this episode you might also get value from my free report, 3 Steps to Increasing the Value of Your Time.